I recently came across a quote that I believe to be incredibly accurate. “Don’t continue dancing with the devil and expect to get out of hell.” Unfortunately, in my case, the court system is forcing the dance to continue, long after the song has ended.
At the last visit, Justin decided a few hours in advance to try to schedule something. Gone are the days where he was making an attempt at notifying me 24 hours in advance, and he thinks he can just schedule as he pleases. My work schedule has never changed. It is not flexible. I work a typical office job, 8-5 Monday through Friday. Last Friday, he decides that he is going to slam a visit together quickly as he’d forgotten to schedule one all week. He failed to give me adequate notice, and there is no way at 10:30 in the morning I can ask my employer for half a day off work because he wants a one hour visit.
I’ve asked him so many times in the past to please give proper notice so I can request time off, which he refuses to do. So, after he tells me that my alternative time is unacceptable to his schedule, a few hours pass and he then decides that he will accept the alternate time. This is after I already tell my mom (who watches my son during the day) that it was ok to take him on a short road trip, as Justin would not be seeing him that evening.
He is trying anything to get a reaction out of me, and it’s simply not working to his benefit. I refuse to stoop to his level. I will not engage him in an argument.
This behavior has continued to set up the next visit that we will have today. He refuses to listen to logic, and it is apparent that he has alternative reasons for not wanting to schedule a time that is best for the child.
As you will note, he likes to text when he knows I’m busy (during work hours) or late at night in hopes that I don’t respond right away. He has used this to tell our case manager that I am non responsive, or slow to respond in an attempt to get me in trouble with the court.
My son’s therapist agrees that the times being scheduled should be around the child’s schedule. She is willing to write a letter to the case manager to make this suggestion.
I don’t hear a response back until this morning, completely ignoring the fact that the child is ill. I had to text the supervisor, because she is a reasonable person, and explain that 1:00 was right in the middle of nap time for the child and she agreed that later in the day would work better for her anyways.
This goes to show that he doesn’t like me also trying to contact the supervisor, when I have every right to contact her regarding a visit. There is nothing in the current paperwork that states he is responsible, because the paperwork issued in February 2017, put him in charge of it and he was unable to meet that requirement. The current paperwork that was issued March 31, 2017 states that both parties are to take on the responsibilities of making the visits work.
Again, I’m not trying to be difficult, im doing what is in the best interests of the child. I’m not denying the visit, I’m trying to work around the child’s schedule when his father doesn’t want to devote much time to being a father.
Speaking of being a father, as you know by now I mark the diapers because I need proof he never changes them. With the hot weather, it’s even more important than ever to keep the child clean under the diaper. The last visit, he wasn’t changed, and I’ve been fixing the diaper rash that occurred over the last few days. It’s almost healed today, just in time for another visit.
It’s terribly unfortunate that a child has to suffer, with blisters in sensitive areas, because his father is too ignorant and lazy to change a diaper. It takes less than a minute, on average, and it’s really not that hard to do.